After Losing His 19-Year-Old Son, He Built a Wine Brand

0:00Jason McClain: My son unfortunately passed away, and one of the things that he loved was living his life on purpose. He was riding his motorcycle back to his ship in San Diego and fell asleep and had an accident and passed away. But one of the things I learned from him in his 19 years was to find things you're passionate about. We only live once, and how many people go through life and they just take a job because it's safe and secure, and then they're miserable.

0:23Robert Barksdale: So what do you say to that person who literally is going through within a year of losing someone very, very precious to them?

0:30Jason McClain: When you are going through something or you lose someone, you need to honor them by living your life as they would want you to do, but also as you would want to do as well.

0:40Robert Barksdale: Hey, my friends, and welcome to another edition of Crush and Climb. I'm your host, Jason McClain, and I've got an amazing co-host standing right to my left. And this guy, when he opens up his mouth and his eyes, the world sings towards him to say he is one of the coolest people on the planet. Ladies and gentlemen, the one and the only, Vito La Fata. Finally, a true introduction.

1:09Jason McClain: A true introduction.

1:11Robert Barksdale: Look into my dandy behind it. He can speak words of wisdom every single day.

1:18Jason McClain: Welcome, welcome, welcome. My wife would not say true.

1:20Robert Barksdale: All right, you know what we do here at Crush and Climb? We fall in love with wine because that's the crush, and then we climb ahead. But today, we're going to crush and we're going to climb with a new, awesome, amazing gentleman who has created something that is better than sliced bread in pockets, and it has to do with wine. My friends, allow me to say welcome to the man, the myth, and the legend, Robert Barksdale. You are the coolest guy on the planet besides him.

1:53Jason McClain: How's that? It's not bad. Not bad? Second best is not bad.

1:55Robert Barksdale: Second best is okay. Yeah, I'll take it. Vito, for you, for you. I know, I know. You know, 1984, remember that time? I'm so humbled, though, don't say this. Well, welcome, man. How are you doing today? Welcome. I'm doing great.

2:05Jason McClain: Excited about all this, so definitely.

2:07Robert Barksdale: You know what? I am looking here. My first thing, before we get into the show and talking to the conversation, and I'm excited about today, but I'm not as excited because you guys have wine in your glasses, and I realized I had to step out for a few minutes because, you know, I had to take care of some children or something like that, and there's no wine in my glass.

2:25Jason McClain: Life has consequences. It does.

2:27Robert Barksdale: This is wrong. Be present. Yep. You snooze, you lose. So pour me some. Somebody pour me some love because I'm not finding, you know, Jesus here.

2:34Jason McClain: Now, this is from your new brand, Unscripted Cellars, right?

2:36Robert Barksdale: This is. What are you pouring for, Jason? Even though you poured me, I haven't had it yet. Okay.

2:41Jason McClain: I am pouring. Would you like some, or you're good? I'll take a little extra. There you go. This could be a long pocket.

2:45Robert Barksdale: He didn't pour very much in my glass, did he? Let me see. Let me see.

2:48Jason McClain: Could you see? Because it was like just a little bit.

2:51Robert Barksdale: You see, this is on this side, right? There you go.

2:54Jason McClain: Hello, Robert.

2:55Robert Barksdale: If you're going to be in the wine industry, you've got to know a legitimate pour.

2:57Jason McClain: Yeah, you've got to do a proper. Don't give him a tasting, give him a pour. It's not a tasting.

3:00Robert Barksdale: It's not a tasting. Look at you. Look at you. This is America.

3:04Jason McClain: Thank you, Vito.

3:04Robert Barksdale: We always pour and we look at each other and say, dogs and cats live together. That's all we do. There you go.

3:10Jason McClain: There you go. Cheers.

3:11Robert Barksdale: Cheers.

3:12Jason McClain: This is our divine detour.

3:14Robert Barksdale: Divine detour. Yeah. All right. What we've all taken in the wine industry.

3:19Jason McClain: Exactly. Exactly. So tell me, what would you like to know about this?

3:23Robert Barksdale: Well, first of all, I want to tell you about it. Okay. And it's good. I love it. I think it's absolutely fantastic. What do we got?

3:30Jason McClain: Barbera and Graziano. Barbera and Graziano. Barbera and Graziano. Two of my favorite grapes.

3:35Robert Barksdale: Really nicely done. I love the color. That was in my brand, too. You know, I do like wine and, you know. Yeah, color. A few good things. Deep purple. But this is like, it's so black as purple. Purple. Purple looking good, brother. I like it. It's good. I'm glad you like it. Delicious. Very good. All right. So, Robert, question client. We start off with the idea of wine and fall in love with wine. And the story begins with wine and ends with wine. And then we just, you know, we try to climb our way out of wherever we are to find tomorrow is going to be a better and brighter day. So, you've got a wine brand here. And before we kind of get into what the wine brand is and what it's all about, I want to get into you for a minute. Okay. So, I guess the first thing I want to do, when I meet somebody or I get to know them really well, I have a series of questions. I just want to roll out there and see if they have any value whatsoever. But I want to get to know who you are and why you decided to go down this wine world. But I think it's going to start with one real question. Can you tell me about a decision you made that you are immensely proud of and very glad you did?

4:44Jason McClain: I think it was, you know, just to do something I really love. I wanted to bring my family together. And this wine name, this wine brand came about because my son unfortunately passed away. And one of the things that he loved was living his life on purpose to, you know, have things that he was passionate about. He joined the Navy. He went skydiving. He loved to go to the beach. He was in tip-top shape. And, you know, I felt like, you know, you only live once. And that's what Robbie would say. And so, I brought my family together, two of my favorite cousins. I wouldn't say they're my favorite because I don't want to get in trouble with the rest of my family, but two of my favorite cousins. And we're passionate about wine and cigars. So, I said, you know, we should do something that we really love. We love wine. We love talking about wine.

5:25Robert Barksdale: Hang on, hang on. Let's go back for a second. I want to get into the wine, but your son passed away. I'm so sorry. How old was he?

5:31Jason McClain: He was 19. 19. He passed away in 2018.

5:34Robert Barksdale: Tell us about him.

5:36Jason McClain: Robbie, you know, Robert Jr. Played sports. He went a little bit against the grain. He played water polo. He swam in high school. He played all the sports when he was younger. Straight-A student. And he wanted to go serve his country. So, he went to the Navy. And while he was in the Navy, unfortunately, he passed away. He was headed back to his ship in San Diego. And he passed away. He had an accident. So, but one of the things I learned from him in his 19 years was to, you know, find things you're passionate about. We only live once. And how many people go through life. And they just take a job because it's safe and secure. And then they're miserable. And so, I just wanted to do something that we love doing. So, I brought my family together. Two different sides of the family. And together, we're doing a wine and a cigar, actually.

6:19Robert Barksdale: So, you know, losing a child. I have experience in that one. It's probably the most difficult thing I had to go through many, many years ago. But my child was much younger at the time. Yours was 19. And so, it was a naval accident.

6:33Jason McClain: He was riding his motorcycle back to his ship in San Diego and fell asleep and had an accident and passed away.

6:41Robert Barksdale: The daytime or night?

6:43Jason McClain: Nighttime.

6:47Robert Barksdale: So, I can tell you, when I've experienced the most tragic thing in my life, sometimes it just makes us all stop, right? We don't know what's really important anymore. And our world's kind of spin upside down for a minute. You've taken this to try to keep his spirit alive in a way to show others or to show yourself or to show a memory of what the joy is about the spirit of Carpe Diem and moving forward in life. Yeah. Why is that so important to you?

7:19Jason McClain: I think because if you don't think positively, you're going to stay in a bad position. And I was depressed for a while. And so, I wanted to change that narrative and say, okay, well, let me take his life and do something positive with it. So, one of the things I do on his birthday and on the anniversary of his death is I do something fun that he would like to do, whether it's working out, going to the beach, having a cigar, spending time with family and friends, because I want to remember the good times and not so much the bad times. And so, I think you can take any negative and turn it into a positive. And so, that's what I choose to do, because you can choose to, you know, look at the glass half empty or you can look at the glass half full. And so, I want to look at the glass half full, whether it's water or even better wine. So, I just try to, you know, remember him. And I want to do something that will honor him and honor his 19 years on this planet. So, we chose to do something that brought the family together. He was very big on family. And so, this is something that we can enjoy and honor his memory instead of being sad about it.

8:19Robert Barksdale: How long has it been?

8:20Jason McClain: Seven years. It was seven years in September.

8:22Robert Barksdale: You know, I always wondered, once you experienced that, did you find it difficult to be vulnerable after that?

8:34Jason McClain: I wouldn't say difficult. I would say it made me realize that life is precious. And it made some things that seemed like they were going to be very stressful or very difficult, not that difficult. Because I think losing a child is the most difficult thing you could ever go through. So, honestly, I think it's made life easier because now I don't sweat the small stuff, honestly. I just look at everything as, you know, you can get through this because you've already been through the worst thing that can happen. So, you know, so that's kind of my mindset.

9:01Robert Barksdale: I talked to a buddy of mine. I don't know, for many, many years. He looked at me and he says, you know, he was going through a challenge with his wife who was diagnosed with breast cancer. And she had to go through that challenge. And he said, yesterday, I had a million problems. Today, I have none. Oh, just one problem. That's it. Just one. And it puts you into a focus. I can imagine the difficulty and the stress. I've been there in my own way. But I just want to know, when you meet somebody who's gone through what you've gone through in some capacity, do you have the words to say something to them? Or do you take the position that stands back and say, I'm not going to say a word because nothing I can say would really show you anything right now?

9:51Jason McClain: I think I have the position that I try to speak, you know, words over them and say, you know, you can get through this. It's not going to be easy, but it's going to be easier because it's still not easy, but it gets easier. You learn how to deal with it. You learn how to cope with it. And I think the blessing is being able to help others that are going through it and just reassuring them that they can get through it.

10:10Robert Barksdale: That's wise wisdom. It's very important wisdom to have. I wonder if I have a friend of mine, 55 years of marriage or 54 years of marriage. He lost his wife last year after those 50 years of marriage. Real dear friend. Loved the man with all my heart and my soul. And he said to me right after she passed, he says, I'm finally becoming the person that my wife wanted me to be for all those years. I think there's a strength that you find once you lose somebody important to you. And that strength kind of just embodies who you are forever. And I agree. You rise up and you become something stronger. So what do you say to that person who literally is going through within a year of losing someone very, very precious to them? Because you've got this gift. You've got the ability. No one's going to be able to help that person unless someone's been through it before.

11:01Jason McClain: I think when you lose someone, you have to realize that, like I said, tomorrow's not promised. And so we only have so many days on this earth. It's almost like a bottle of wine. It has a shelf life. And so when you are going through something or you lose someone, you need to honor them by, you know, living your life as they would want you to do, but also as you would want to do as well. So I think that's the best thing you can do is to try to honor their memory by, you know, doing your best every day.

11:29Robert Barksdale: What's the one thing that is the biggest mistake you made? And tell me the story that got you to make the most horrible mistake of your life. How'd you get through it?

11:39Jason McClain: Most horrible mistake of my life? I've had so many, but maybe pick one.

11:44Robert Barksdale: Besides meeting us.

11:45Jason McClain: Yeah, yeah, exactly. I would just say taking life for granted and not realizing, you know, we have a saying, we have more summers behind us than in front of us. And so just taking things for granted.

11:57Robert Barksdale: That's a general. I want a specific. I want one story from you about one mistake that you regret, you wish you didn't do that.

12:05Jason McClain: Maybe when my kids were younger, my sons were younger, spending more time with them and not being so focused on work and trying to get ahead, but realizing that you got to spend more time. You know, just a simple thing, staying at home on a Saturday instead of always working.

12:18Robert Barksdale: So no one thing.

12:20Jason McClain: I mean, that's it. I would say that's a big thing, you know, missing time with your kids because you're trying to work and get ahead and then realizing that the job is not that important. So I would say that.

12:29Robert Barksdale: I think that's huge. That's a culmination of the same mistake done over and over.

12:34Jason McClain: Exactly.

12:35Robert Barksdale: That to have that perspective, that's one of the biggest things I've tried to like look at in my life right now as well as to be like, you know, we had a near drowning incident with Luca. Luckily he made it through, but every day I'm like, I'm like, I get it. We're all busting ass. We're all trying to build empire. We're trying to do the things that we do, but I'm like, nothing replaced that time with the kids because you only have so long with it. So death reminds us of that every day. Should you internalize, take it, do something with it. So sometimes I think it's not the big one thing. It's the understanding of how death by a thousand cuts is almost worse than anything that the awareness to that and then deciding, I don't want to go down that path. It's almost like how many times you need to hear it before you recognize until it comes in your life, the person that got cancer. Oh, you never thought it happened to you. Oh, you never thought this would happen. But when we have the awareness to say, I don't want to go down that path. I'm going to choose to live because other people taught me how to think through this. That's a great place to be in life. And we seize control, if you will.

13:36Robert Barksdale: I don't know, sorry, control, but we live the way that we can. So do you have any mentors that you really admire and look up to?

13:48Jason McClain: Definitely. When I became a principal, Mr. Crittenden, he, you know, kind of funny, he suspended me when I was in seventh grade. But I looked up to him because all of the knuckleheads in our area were scared of him. He wore suits, he wore nice watches, shoes always shine, everybody respected him. And it kind of made me want to become a principal because I saw the respect he got. So, you know, I went from getting suspended four years in a row to becoming a principal. So Lonnie Crittenden was one of the ones that comes to mind, definitely.

14:16Robert Barksdale: Is he still around?

14:16Jason McClain: I know he's passed away, but he's a longtime administrator in Los Angeles. He was a school board member in Inglewood and very well respected in the community.

14:25Robert Barksdale: So you were an educator for many years.

14:27Jason McClain: 24 years.

14:28Robert Barksdale: And then became a principal.

14:29Jason McClain: Became a principal.

14:30Robert Barksdale: And from there, you... Went into real estate. Into real estate. All right. That's quite a transition from one thing to another. How'd that come about?

14:38Jason McClain: Actually, I worked both jobs for 12 years. And, you know, I think teachers and administrators make really good realtors because they're very organized, very detail-oriented. So I did both because I had a passion for real estate, which my mom worked in real estate. So I got it from her. Had a passion for it. Worked as a principal. There's only so many kids you can suspend. Only so many fights you can break up on Fridays at 3 o'clock. So I decided that, you know, let's spend more time with my kids instead of raising other people's children. And so I made the transition about 12 years ago to go full-time in real estate.

15:10Robert Barksdale: All right. Have you looked back? Do you still do real estate? Never.

15:12Jason McClain: Haven't missed it one day. Haven't missed being a principal one day. Love real estate. The flexibility. You know, you can work from anywhere. You can make as much money as you want to make as, you know, hard as you're willing to work. And, you know, your time is yours. So I haven't looked back at all.

15:27Robert Barksdale: All right. So you've got a very dynamic past, a dynamic sense of outlook. Your outlook integrity is quite high. You know, you look to me like a man who just says, you know what? I've seen it. I've done it. And now I want to do something else. And you want to engage it. So tell us about the wine. First of all, give me the story behind the name of the wine, the brand itself. And why it is that you chose that name.

15:55Jason McClain: Unscripted Sellers is, it just focuses on, as we talked about, living your best life. You only live once. Not having a scripted life where you get the job that, you know, is safe and you retire from. And then you have to go work another job after you retire. I didn't want to have that life. I wanted to have a life that I could enjoy because we only get one life. And so Unscripted Sellers really is about living a life that you can be passionate about. How many people have a job or a life or a career or something they're not passionate about. They just do it because it's the right thing to do. I didn't want to have that life. I wanted to have a life that I could enjoy, especially after losing my son. I said, you know what? You know, I have to enjoy my life. I have to honor his legacy because he was really passionate about all the things that he did. He enjoyed his life, whether it was working out, serving in the Navy, skydiving. So I just wanted to have that life because, you know, who knows how long we're going to be here.

16:49Robert Barksdale: Sure. And why wine? You can do this in beer or any other product. Wine is one of the hardest industries in the world to make a dollar in. Why go down that road?

16:58Jason McClain: I would say because I enjoy wine. It's something I'm passionate about. If I didn't make a ton of money, but I enjoy doing it with my family, I'd still be happy. And so I said, you know, we should do a wine and eventually a cigar. But wine is something I love. I've been wine tasting for probably 22 years. And so I said, well, I could enjoy this and, you know, maybe make a career out of it, a third career.

17:20Robert Barksdale: So you like to drink?

17:22Jason McClain: Slightly.

17:24Robert Barksdale: I only drink on two occasions. Alone or with someone?

17:29Jason McClain: Night and day.

17:32Robert Barksdale: All right. Well, I'll drink to that one. Cheers. There you go.

17:35Jason McClain: Salud.

17:35Robert Barksdale: You guys are nuts. I love it.

17:37Jason McClain: Yes. Salud.

17:39Robert Barksdale: So, okay. You've got a cigar brand as well.

17:45Jason McClain: Unscripted cigars.

17:46Robert Barksdale: Tell us about that.

17:47Jason McClain: So we have cigars coming out of Nicaragua and the Dominican Republic. We're going to start with five cigars from each country. A couple milds, a couple mediums, and one full body. So those are the lighter ones to the stronger ones. And cigars and wine are a great pairing. They go together. A lot of wine drinkers enjoy cigars and vice versa. And I think both of them allow you to relax. You can have great conversations with wine, great conversations with cigars. And for me, cigars allow me to sit for an hour or two and just relax. After a long day, maybe I've worked 12 hours. I can watch a game or just have conversation and just enjoy, you know, wine and a cigar. So that's really, they go together. My two cousins that I'm doing a wine with are also in the cigar business with me, and we enjoy both cigars and wine. So it's just something we can do together to enjoy our time.

18:35Robert Barksdale: You know, I've seen you on YouTube or Facebook or what have you with your real estate videos time by time. And I'm excited to see you on there with your wine videos. When is that going to come out?

18:47Jason McClain: Hopefully as soon as possible. Like yesterday.

18:51Robert Barksdale: Yesterday.

18:51Jason McClain: So hopefully we can have, I'll have the wine on. I have somebody that does my social media for me because I'm 57, so I'm not really in a social media age group. But yeah, we're definitely going to have wine on there and cigars.

19:02Robert Barksdale: You're not in the social media. We got Facebook.

19:04Jason McClain: Yeah, I do.

19:05Robert Barksdale: Come on. That's for old people. That's right. Yeah, young people. That's my world star.

19:10Jason McClain: Instagram and TikTok. But I have a TikTok as well, even though I don't know how to work it, but I pay someone to work it for me. So definitely going to have the wine and cigars on there.

19:21Robert Barksdale: I love it. I love it. What do you want the world to know about untributed sellers?

19:26Jason McClain: That tomorrow's not promised, that you should do things that you love doing. And I think that not to get too spiritual, but that's what God put us here. He's going to put a plan in your life, and you need to follow that. Figure out what you love doing. If you love what you do, you never have to work another day in your life.

19:44Robert Barksdale: So what do you tell the person who, you know, we say that to our kids all day long, right? You'll find a job. You'll find a career. You'll find something, a location you can do that you love, and you'll never work a day in your life. I always think that's the worst advice to give somebody on planet Earth because most of the time, it's going to be impossible to find something you really just love. And then the thing you love becomes more work than it should be. And it just becomes, it's more than a mindset. It's a reality set. So how do you find that balance? I mean, if I look at unscripted sellers, and I love the idea of you only live once, the idea that, hey, we're going to try something new and unique and let you make sure that you live in a way that your son did, which is taking each and every single day and making it count. So how do you say that to somebody so that they can get this one? How do I take someone in a bottle of unscripted sellers in my hand, a glass, and help that person realize that they are so inherently valuable that they deserve to make a change in their life? How do you convince someone of that one when they're in the everyday of the world?

20:48Jason McClain: I think, well, the name of this wine is Divine Detour. And sometimes we come up against a moment where we figure out that we want to do something different. And I think for those people, you need to tell them, you know what? Why not do what you love? Why are you just settling? Don't settle. I don't think God wants us to settle. I think he wants us to live our life to the fullest. So why not find what you like doing? Because if you like doing it, you're going to be good at it. If you like wine, you're going to be good at making wine and trying wine. If you like working with young people, you're going to be good at it. So it's not going to feel like work. So even when you work a 12-hour day, if it's something you love, you're not looking at the clock. When you have a job you don't like, you're looking at the clock every 15 minutes. When you find something you love, you're not worried about it because you're in your passion. So I would say find what you love and you'll be good at it.

21:33Robert Barksdale: That's great advice. I love it. I love that one. What about you, V? So wine and cigars is often an experience, a community, a connection around that. What's the vision for how you're going to bring people together? Are there going to be events? Is there going to be what? Give us a little insight into that because I think listeners would love to hear how they can tap into those experiences, those events, et cetera. Because I see that stuff all the time. I'm already thinking about smoking in the vines.

22:02Jason McClain: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

22:03Robert Barksdale: Yeah, no. I mean. Don't set the vines on fire.

22:05Jason McClain: As you mentioned, wine and cigars go together. We're going to have pop-up events. I've already talked to some wine lounges, also some food vendors. So we want to have food. We want to have wine. We want to have cigars. We want to have a food experience.

22:19Robert Barksdale: You did talk to McLean Cellars and La Fata Cellars. I did. That was the first. Because you said wine lounges. I'm like. Yes, those were the first two. I'm like, what are the wine lounges you talking to? Yeah, yeah. You know what show you on right now?

22:28Jason McClain: McLean Cellars and La Fata Cellars. I talked to you guys. We already have a vision. I took photos out in Temecula. We want to have something at Vito's property. We want to pair. We want to have good company, good wine, good cigars, and good conversation. So we want to bring all those things together. I think that, you know, bringing all that together is going to enhance the brand. It's going to get people to recognize our brand. But we just want people to have a good time, to enjoy themselves, so we can bring food, wine, cigars, and conversation together. I think that's a great pairing.

23:01Robert Barksdale: I love it. I love it. I'm hoping you're planning to tell the stories behind each of these wines. Absolutely. It'll be eight cigars, eight wines.

23:07Jason McClain: Yeah, yeah. Ten cigars, ten wines. Yeah, easy. You know, we don't want to go too hard the first year. So, yes, definitely. I love it.

23:15Robert Barksdale: Well, I'm excited for you, and I'm excited for Unscripted Sellers, and the launch and its future. I think it's going to be fantastic. I know that, you know, truth be told, Vito and I have had fun helping you, you know, navigate your world in some capacity. But more importantly, this is all you. This is all your dream, all your vision, and, you know, I like to sit back and just drink.

23:36Jason McClain: Yeah. That's a nerd. That sounds fun. Yeah. That's a good thing. Exactly.

23:40Robert Barksdale: I'm still waiting for my box.

23:42Jason McClain: Yeah, I got you.

23:45Robert Barksdale: It's on order. I love it. I love it. I love it. All right, my friends. So, I want to make sure we put down under this podcast, under this episode, on this video, all the links, all the details, all the love that people can get into. And I want to make sure that if you're thinking about one thing in your life, about what's really important. You heard it from a very intelligent gentleman who said to you, life is too short to do something you don't enjoy. And he made a decision to leave one career into another one and then diversify it with his love and passion off of a memory that's so precious. So, when you're going to climb out of your world, first thing you want to think about is, who do you hang on to? And a guy like this is someone I'd love to hang on to. So, here's to you.

24:40Jason McClain: Thank you, sir.

24:41Robert Barksdale: Unscripted Cellars.

24:42Jason McClain: And Unscripted Cigars. And Unscripted Cigars.

24:45Robert Barksdale: And hang on. Live Once. YOLO, baby. That's it. All right, my friends. Hey, like, subscribe. More importantly, get some Unscripted Cellars, some wine, and you find the triumph inside of your trail. Because it's good. So, to you, you, and you, and me, and to you. Cheers. Thank you for joining entrepreneur, author, speaker, and winery owner, Jason McLean, on the Crush and Climb podcast. Here, we hammer raw experience into wisdom, helping you not just bounce back, but bounce forward with new strength. To continue the journey and build a life that's not just successful, but significant, subscribe to Crush and Climb wherever you get your podcasts. Let's raise a glass to the journey.